How do you stop googling pregnancy symptoms?

Google.  It’s both a blessing and a curse.  It’s a time saver and the biggest time waster you’ll ever come across.  A source of relief and additional anxiety at the same time.  It’s a wealth of knowledge and a source of self-destruction.  And when you’re pregnant after infertility or loss, it becomes an obsession.  A compulsion.  An addiction.  It’s enough to drive us crazy.

It’s hard to stop when you get started, and before you know it, you’re down the google rabbit hole.  You’re reading about random strangers, self-diagnosing things you never even knew existed, and you CAN NOT STOP.

If this is you, you’re not alone.  We’re all familiar with the frenzy and that feeling of being out of control.

So how do you stop, and what’s a better approach?

Before we get into that, let’s first understand WHY we turn to google. And no, it’s not because you’re crazy.  For so long, google has become our source of truth.  When I was growing up, there was no such thing as google (yes, I may be showing my age). If we didn’t know the answer to something, we would either go to the library, ask someone smarter, or be satisfied with the answer – I don’t know? 

But today, it’s easily accessible – at our fingertips in fact. And google usually has the answer to any question you type into your search bar.  Google has become the answer.  If you don’t know something. Just google it. Simple, right?!

What we forget however, is that it’s simply a computer.  It’s not a predictor, it doesn’t know you (although it knows my taste pretty well now), and it does not have the answer to the question – will this pregnancy result in a healthy baby in my arms in the end?  Annoying, right?  But because we’re so used to it having the answers, we continue to search. 

In fact, what we’re looking for when we start searching, is Certainty.  We want to know how our story ends. There is so much uncertainty on this journey, and we’ve experienced so much pain, that we just want to know whether all the stress we are going through right now will be worth it.

We are also searching for Hope. We need evidence that things do work out in the end.  We need to be able to trust that we’ll get our happily ever after, and who do you trust more than google? And we get that by diving our way through statistics. Random papers and blogs claiming to know the answer.  We want relief and comfort, and something to reduce our fears.

And then you find yourself reading about other people’s experiences in public forums, because we crave Connection. So, we compare our symptoms, searching for validation and other stories where it all worked out in the end. We want to know that it’s not just us. 

When we feel a twinge, we try to find out exactly what it is, and what it could mean.  We open up our google search engine, and before we know it, we’ve clicked on 5 different articles and officially gone down the rabbit hole.  But now, instead of getting the simple answer we wanted, we’ve spent the last 2 hours reading about incompetent cervixes, placenta previa, and ectopic pregnancies.  Not only are we feeling confused and terrified, but we’re also wondering who turned the clock forward.  Where on earth did that time go?

Now you know WHY you’re searching for the answers, the next step is recognizing that your needs are not being met. In fact, in most cases, it’s making you feel worse.

Because the more we try to become certain about something, the less certain we will feel. It causes confusion because it provides so much information that we just don’t need.  It introduces new fears that we didn’t even know existed.  You will feel your stress levels increase and panic set in.

And then you’ll look at the time, and realize you wasted it.  You’ll feel guilty, and may even start punishing yourself for being so silly.

If you don’t believe me, have a think about the last time you searched for something on there.  How did you feel afterward?  Did you feel certain, or hopeful, or connected? 

Google is never going to give you any certainty because it does not know you.  And while there may be other women who have had similar experiences in their pregnancies, we are all different.  In fact, you can’t even compare your previous pregnancy to this one, because everything is different – different egg, sperm, embryo, cells - you are different from last time too.  No one has the same genetic make-up, or experiences. 

So how do you resist the temptation to google everything, and finally take back control? How do you stop falling into the google trap?

Here are some tips -

1. Keep reminding yourself – google does not have the answer to the ultimate question that I want to know. This can become a mantra. You can even put a sticky note on your computer.
   

2. You can also connect googling with how it ultimately makes you feel afterward – whether that’s a state of uncertainty, panic, confusion, fear, guilt over time wasted etc. Then the next time you go to google, remind yourself – google will make me feel worse.  
   

3. If you absolutely have to search for something, set a timer on your phone for 5 minutes.  If you don’t find your answer by the time the alarm goes off, close down your search engine.  This will make sure your research is more targeted, and you don’t get distracted.
   

4. Another strategy is to get your partner or a friend to google anything you would like to know.  That way they won’t get distracted, and will provide you with an answer that is succinct and doesn’t involve you clicking a million links and going down that rabbit hole. 
   

5. If you have any questions, go direct to your doctor.  They are the only ones who know your unique situation and can provide you with the correct answer. Remember – there are no silly questions – we’re not supposed to know this stuff.  They’re the professionals.  You’re paying them for their advice, so use it.  If you’re hesitant to ask them, perhaps you don’t need to google it either.
   

6. Join Your Pregnancy Haven. Our community is filled with real women, just like you, who are going through a similar experience right now.  The chat group is filled with questions and advice, similar to those questions you would turn to google for. These women use this forum to avoid google.  Imagine having a safe space to ask questions and find relief and reassurance?  Not to mention that connection you’ve been craving, right? If you’d like more information on our program, you can find it HERE.

I promise you, when you close down that google search engine and detox from all the stories, you will find peace. Because it slows your mind from spinning. It stops the constant questions that keep coming up.

And keep remembering, google does not have the answer to your ultimate question.

READY TO FIND PEACE IN YOUR PREGNANCY?

Start feeling the hope, excitement and joy you deserve in your pregnancy.

Receive INSTANT ACCESS to this essential guide with 5 easy tips that you can implement today.